Andrea: learning things the hard way so that you don’t have to.
I’m usually a super clean eater. I mean, I’m vegan and gluten-free, so that helps, but just in general, I eat well.
Yesterday, though, I went on a bit of a snack heyday. It started in the afternoon when I met up with my friend Caitlin for frozen yogurt. See, my new weakness is soy frozen yogurt from this place called Tutti Frutti. It’s ridiculously delicious and you can cover it in all sorts of toppings, which is basically my idea of heaven.
(GAH! So good.)
So that happened.
I should mention that before my frozen yogurt date, I went grocery shopping on an empty stomach to stock up on snacks for the next month, because my schedule’s about to get INSANE and I know I’ll need to be constantly re-fueling.
So I went home after frozen yogurt and naturally, I sampled many of the snacks I bought while I put them away.
Then I made dinner and ate lots of that.
Then I went on a movie date with a friend, so naturally, I ate all the movie theatre popcorn (popcorn in general is one of my all-time favourite foods). Because DELICIOUS.
SIDENOTE: We’re The Millers is pretty funny. Not stellar, but funny enough.
After the movie, it was 12:15am and my friend turned to me and said, “So now what? Should we hang out?”
“Sure, I’m up for anything.”
…Which landed us at Boston Pizza, one of the only places that was still open.
“Even though I just ate popcorn, I really want some pizza.” he said as we sat down, “Can you eat anything here?”
“I can eat FRENCH FRIES!” I said, because YUM.
So then I ate all the French fries.
I got home at 2:30am, rolled my ass into bed, and finally fell asleep around 3:30am after some tossing and turning due to ALL THE FOOD IN MY STOMACH.
When my alarm went off this morning, I wasn’t ready for it. I had set it for basically the last possible minute I could get up, get dressed, and run to teach my Zumba class.
I figured I should put some sort of nutrient rich something into my body, despite still feeling pretty full. So I had a protein shake and went to the gym.
Look how happy I look when I’m being a Zumba instructor!
Today didn’t feel like that.
It did at first. I welcomed my class – which was big and energetic and awesome, as usual – and I started my warm-up and I thought everything was fine until about eight minutes into class when my stomach was like “NU UH!” and started rebelling against me.
Suddenly moving felt very difficult and very wrong.
My skin started to feel clammy and cold.
“Oh God,” I thought, “This is it. This is going to be my horrific, embarrassing teaching moment.“
SIDENOTE: Even more embarrassing than this day, which in hindsight wasn’t too awful.
I am proud to say that I hate vomiting enough that I was able to fight it off. I feel like it was some seriously impressive mind over matter shit. In my head, it went a little like this:
You’re NOT going to vomit. You’re NOT going to vomit. Slow down. Move less. Keep smiling. OHMYGOD I’M GOING TO VOMIT. NO. NO. YOU ARE NOT. YOU ARE NOT GOING TO VOMIT. You can do this. It’s an hour. It’ll go by fast. Breathe. OH VOMIT! Nope. No vomit. Do NOT vomit. Okay, what happens if I need to vomit? No, you know what? Don’t entertain the possibility. it’s not going to happen. NO VOMIT. It’s not going to happen. WHY FRENCH FRIES WHY?! FUCK.
And then eventually it faded. I survived. I didn’t even vomit after!
But let me tell you something, I’ve super learned my lesson. And that is that if you’re going to have a little HEY LET’S EAT ALL THE FOOD day, you should definitely not do it the day before you’re teaching a morning fitness class. Do it the day before a day where you can just like, sit, digest, and let life happen at you.