Yesterday I got to spend the day in a beautiful location watching two of my favourite people get married.
Holy cow, guys, it was perfect. I feel so lucky to have been there, and so lucky to know the happy couple (Hi, Mandelle and Adam! I love you guys!).
It happened in a small town just outside of Calgary – a quaint, storybook country setting.
My friend Caitlin and I got dolled up and had basically the best time ever.
We laughed, cried, ate, and danced our asses off. I don’t think I have ever had that much fun dancing at a wedding. My friend Caitlin’s a damn good date. I highly recommend her presence.
I’m not going to go into great detail on the wedding today, though I might talk about it more another time. For now, I’m just setting the scene for a hilarious moment.
When I say we were dancing our asses off, I totally mean it. We danced like crazy people – air punching, shimmying, jumping, shaking our butts, scream-singing along to the Spice Girls and scream-rapping along to Run DMC (shout out to Keith, our friend and DJ, for taking my song request). When “It’s Like That” came on, our shoes came off and we really went for it.
Right at the end of the night, a guy we had met throughout the wedding day and night hopped onto the dance floor to dance with us. We were all having a great time when he dropped into a dramatic dance move, really low to the ground.
Cue the sound of a record scratch and the music going dead silent. (But only in our minds, because in real life the music kept playing.)
His face flashed from “having a great time” to “oh my fucking god” faster than any of us could even process.
“I ripped my pants!” he shouted over the music.
“Ha ha!” I laughed. I thought he was joking.
“I ripped my pants!” he said again, scurrying off the dance floor.
“Oh my god!” Caitlin and I said to one another, feeling both extreme sympathy and extremely amused.
It soon became clear that he wasn’t – ahem – properly attired to continue dancing despite the rip. If you know what I mean.
AND THEN I HAD A FLASHBACK TO:
A night in Glasgow. A few of my classmates and I had been out to see what was the worst production of Othello I have ever seen in my life. It was so bad, in fact, that we ran away at intermission. If you know me at all, you know that a production/movie/anything has to be horrendous for me to leave before it’s over, because if I can avoid being disrespectful of the work being presented to me, I will. I’ve been a producer. I’ve been a director. I’ve been an actor. I teach Zumba classes all week. I know what it feels like to watch people walk out of your work.
But it was that bad.
Now, all of my classmates are like me, so we all felt guilty for leaving, but we were desperate. So naturally, we didn’t leave the theatre calmly. Well, we left the auditorium calmly – but then we ran. Why did we run? I don’t know. I still run to the parkade every time I leave work early, even when my boss tells me to leave work early. I guess my instincts tell me I may be caught and chastised or something.
Regardless, we hurried.
I was speed walking down a dark, narrow street next to my classmate Carissa when we all heard an “OooooOOP!” and our friend Janice disappeared from our peripheral vision.
There was a thud.
Our first instinct, of course, was to say, “Oh my god, are you okay?”
The only response we got was laughter, which started small and built up to straight up maniacal. Janice was beside herself; she could not stop.
“Guys! Guys!” she tried to talk between gasps for air, “It’s a banana! It’s a BANANA!”
We looked around, trying to determine what the hell she was talking about.
And there it was.
Janice had slipped on a banana peel.
Need I say more?
Lesson learned: Sometimes those quintessential “movie moments” happen in real life. And boy, are they ever entertaining.
P.S. Totally just shared the link to this post on Facebook only to have my friend Janice tell me that it was Carissa who slipped, not her! I guess I remembered it backwards because I was LAUGHING FOREVER.