Remember back in November when I wrote about not having a “type” of guy and instead being attracted to certain personality traits?

Sort of?

The Super Quick Re-Cap, brought to you by Andrea:

I dig guys who are at least one, but potentially all,* of the following…

  • Smart
  • Fucking Hilarious
  • Weird
  • Nerdy
  • Writing Talent
  • A Sexy Accent
  • Scottish
  • Idris Elba

(You can read the whole shebang and see photos of men I find sexy here.)

(SPOILER ALERT: One of them is Idris Elba.)

I forgot a trait. Perhaps the most important of them all.


That’s right. Apparently, I am only interested in men who are already taken.**

In the last year,*** I have had crushes on at least six guys whom I have learned are very not up for grabs. The most recent? My workplace crush. Ridiculously intelligent, quiet, kind, funny, with a sexy accent. One day it was my JOB to go talk to him. That was the best day at work.

This week he showed up with not only a partner, but children in tow.


CUT TO: Me, craving some seriously tacky music (possible songs include “Survivor” by Destiny’s Child and “Miss Independent” by Kelly Clarkson), a lot of chocolate (or cake, or cookies), and some privacy in which to deal with my ridiculous, teenage heartbreak.

Wife? Kids? Really? Are you sure you don’t wanna leave that behind to hang out with me instead in a non-committed way (‘cos I’m not into that)?

Well, shit.
Well, shit.

Lesson learned: I have excellent taste in men, which doesn’t often work in my favour.


*Mmm…Scottish Idris Elba in nerd glasses writing a book of mathematical jokes while wearing a cowboy hat and stroking his pet iguana…

**Or gay. But that hasn’t happened in a while, so maybe my gaydar’s getting stronger. MAYBE.